John Moe: On the Cognitive Dissonance of Seeing Bon Scott Sing 'Build Me Up Buttercup'
by John Moe
July 13, 2016
Sometimes a video can be amusing, then funny, then existentially upsetting. Such was the case when I came across this one of Bon Scott, the late singer of AC/DC, singing the '60s bubblegum pop classic, "Build Me Up Buttercup."
Look at him! Doing the second vocal with a group called The Valentines!
The first time I was ever truly and deeply frightened by rock 'n' roll, Bon Scott was a major contributing factor. It was in sixth grade and somebody — can't remember who, possibly Greg Sherman — brought this album to school and we all sat around and stared at it for quite a long time:
Highway to Hell! Left to right, we have Malcolm Young looking like every friend of my older brother, bassist Cliff Williams getting forgotten in back, what looks like a stoned Phil Rudd, Angus Young with devil horns, a devil tail, and a Mick Jagger sneer, and then Bon Scott THINKING THIS IS ALL HILARIOUS.
I'd like to say that I became metal that day but I was too nervous a child and instead I was just scared. Back then, in the aftermath of The Exorcist and toward the dawning of an era of religious conservatism, people were terrified of the Devil. Satan wasn't an antiquated theological construct, Satan was real and evil and constantly looking to claim your soul and drag you to hell (Satan would replaced as an omnipresent threat a few years later by Drugs). As children, we had to be on guard against Satan. And here was probably Greg Sherman just bringing this to class.
I had to conclude that one of two things was going on that day: either this band were legit actual Satanists and Bon Scott was laughing about how the Dark Lord would reap souls whilst mewling mortals fruitlessly wailed OR they were all JUST KIDDING. About Satan! And these professional recording artists are so stupid and naïve that they would unwittingly loose Hell's fury upon us all!
Now, all this was happening at a time and at a school where a lot of the boys would regularly bring knives to school — jackknives mostly, but other types as well — to display to classmates but also to stick in things, cut things, and occasionally whittle(!) during down time. Far from being hauled into the office or expelled or arrested, these kids would at most be told by teachers to put those things away. Gum was a bigger deal than knives. So actual danger, the danger we were stupid enough to carry in our pockets, was not a big deal because we understood what knives were.
Music was a different matter. MTV had not quite happened yet, let alone YouTube and social media. So all we had to go on about a band were articles in Hit Parader, Creem or Rolling Stone (which many of us lacked the means and permission to acquire) and album covers. With AC/DC, there were serious conversations about how this is the heaviest heavy metal you've ever heard. This meant power. Being the heaviest band was, in real-world terms, like being the President or the richest person on Earth.
Ergo: AC/DC = Power + Satan.
Then, the person who brought the album, let's just say it was Greg Sherman (Greg! Email me!), told us all that Bon Scott was dead. Wow. He had died with all the potentially evil laughing secrets. He was probably seated at Satan's right hand even at that moment. HE MUST HAVE RIDDEN ON THE ACTUAL HIGHWAY TO HELL TO GET THERE. In a Trans Am, I figured.
Years passed, the spookiness subsided, I saw AC/DC live and realized they weren't evil, just noisy, Brian Johnson sounded sort of like Scott and wore a hat all the time for some reason, they kept making albums that got steadily worse, and now they tour with portly Axl Rose on vocals. But none of that march toward mediocrity involved Bon Scott. He was always preserved in evil amber.
Then the other day I see him in this video. Puffy sleeves, harmless smile, Bay City Rollers haircut, doing the second vocal on one of the most harmless songs ever with The Valentines. And it bothered me. Because Bon was now a real person with a real past, where he had worked his way through his chosen profession as real people do. He had been a pop singer for a time. And a metal singer later. And neither was probably his "real" self because they were just parts of things he could do to make a living and maybe have some fun.
This was at odds with my metal/mental cosmology. I wanted Bon Scott compartmentalized. I wanted him screeching AC/DC songs and smiling, literally, in the face of evil (Angus) (not really evil) (still touring!) (good for you, Angus!) (you are 61 years old). Letting go of that and accepting Bon Scott as a Valentine means everything is a bit more mundane in a world that had once been thrillingly treacherous. It means learning how the magic trick is done. It means Satan isn't real and the primary danger people face is people. That's a drag.
But I do find solace in the one thing that stayed consistent between the different stages of Scott's career: the smile. He's smiling with The Valentines and he's smiling on the Highway to Hell cover. Looks like he had fun all the way through. And as far as messages to replace ambiguous evil go, that's a pretty good one. Hail Satan.
John Moe is heard every Wednesday on Oake & Riley in the Morning, commenting on the latest Internet trends. He also co-hosts the podcast Conversation Parade (with Open Mike Eagle) on the Infinite Guest network, and is an author of a number of books, including The Deleted Emails of Hilary Clinton: A Parody and Dear Luke, We Need To Talk, Darth: And Other Pop Culture Correspondences.